The Indian Express

My wife said that we have to switch over to The Indian Express.
“Why can’t we also subscribe to The Indian Express and read all the leaked news instead of reading about some Techies being hijacked and murdered and how bad the traffic jam is going to be today with that lady with the saree over her head trying to fly some plane”
I said: “Its not good to read leaked news, and shame on you. You don’t know the name of the president of India. You have to give everyone a chance. It cannot be Kalaam forever”
Meanwhile my son interjected: “Papa what is this Liberhan report?”
Me “It’s a long story son. But the jist of it is that nobody did anything 17 years ago”
Mother-in-law : “Oh my God look they are demolishing the . . . . . . . . .”
Me : “for Gawd’s sake. . . . .where is that remote. . . . . . .some one please put that TV off.. . . . .. ..Ma I told you umpteen times what they are showing is something that happened many many years ago”
Son: “So what happened 17 years ago?”
Me :“Son, do you know what Bofors is?”
Son: “No”
Me : “See, that is why commissions and inquiries are set up. At regular intervals they will open and close the files so that every generation down the line will know what Bofors is”
Son: “Papa that picture you took of the Taj hotel, was it before or after the incident?”

Me : “What incident? No incident happened there”
Son: “But Pa, we have video footing of Kasab with an automatic. . . . . “
Me : “Don’t jump to conclusions. Those video things are the result of some faulty CCTV installed at the wrong places. Investigations are going on and maybe after about 17 years we will hear actually what happened and where the bullet proof jacket disappeared. It will also be established that the Judge was right in giving Kasab non-veg biriyani in the prison. For all you know he may be put in a rubber dinghy and send back the way he came. Poor fellow”
Son: “and the other picture that you took in the night, was it because you knew that it would be torched in the night”

Me: “What utter rubbish. Don’t go about spreading such rumors. I just clicked some pictures because I liked the way Taj Hotel looked at night. As it is I am having a bad name because people are using my pictures in their blogs and Viquipedia in some foreign language which I can't read. Somebody has even put it on Newspapers24.com , whatever that is. . . . . . .Hey who put that TV on again?”
Wife: “Aha there is our PM. I hope Obama bends properly when he greets our prime minister”
Me: “It is not for us to decide the degree of difficulty whenever Obama meets heads of states”
Mother-in-law: “With our PM in the USA and our President in Pune who is going to take care of our country in the centre?”
Me” “Don’t worry Ma, this is not a classroom where we need some one to mind the class. We have got some well behaved elected members in the centre who can take care of us. After all we have elected them”
Son: “But Pa you did not tell me what Bofors is”
Me: “So far I have only understood that it is some big gun and something to do with some one by the name of Quattroachi”