Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Poona Coffee House

After reading the papers, I am getting the jitters.
Daily there is some news about some one or the other getting raided based on the connection between that person and Mr Kalmadi.
Poor guy, he conducted the Commonwealth games so well and India bagged so many medals, but now that the games are over, all are pouncing on him and accusing him of so many things. Nobody is praising him for the lovely opening ceremony that he orchestrated. How can one forget the lovely and colourful Indian dances that were performed.

I confided my fears to my wife about the raids that are conducted.
Wifey  “but why are you so worried about it?”
Me  : “you see once upon a time I had given him some money”
Wifey : “What ? and when was that ?”
Me : “in 1975”
Wifey: So long ago? And how much was that amount?”
Me : “Three rupees fifty paise”

Wifey : “That’s all? And why did you pay him that princely amount?”
Me: “Three rupees for Idli chutney (with sambhar of course) and fifty paise for the coffee”
Wifey: “Now this is all getting very confusing. Why did you have to pay the great Kalmadi for Idli and Coffee?”
Me: “Please correct yourself, it was Idli with chutney and Sambhar and Coffee. Let me explain. I was strolling down Deccan Gymkhana when I saw this Poona Coffee House and decided to get some coffee. Once inside, I decided to have some Idli too. So they served me hot Idlis (of course with Chutney and Sambhar) and with some nice coffee. The bill amount came to three rupees and fifty paise. I dutifully paid the bill at the counter to a man clad in crisp white kurta pajamas. It was only later that I realized that this gentleman sitting at the cash till was none other than the great Suresh Kalmadi who owned the place.”

Wifey: “ Wow you came face to face with Mr Suresh Kalmadi. Now I can tell my friends that my husband met Mr Kalmadi and ….”
Me : “You will tell no such thing. As it is I am worried about having paid him money. What if the CBI comes to some conclusion that I paid Mr Kalmadi with some ulterior motive?”
Wifey: “Wait a minute, do you have the bill?”
Me : “What bill? Oh you mean the one I got at the hotel? No I don't have it. Kamladi took it from me and stuck it on some pointed skewer that he had on his table. In fact there were lots of bills on that skewer. I wonder if all those poor people will get arrested. I hope he has not  destroyed those bills. At least that could prove that I paid him for the Idli (with chutney and Sambhar) with Coffee”
Wifey : “Its just a piece of bad luck that you had to go into the Poona Coffee House”
Me : “Do you know Narayana Murthy proposed to Sudha at the Poona Coffee House

Wifey: “You mean Narayana Murthy of Infosys? Oh my God see where they have reached. If only you too had proposed to me at Poona Coffee House, instead of some lousy place at East Street
Me: “You are straying away from the point. Here I am worried about not getting caught for three rupees fifty paise”
Wifey: “You are really turning yourself into a celebrity isn’t it. Last month you told me you had met some one who met Hitler, and now this. I wonder what else you have up your sleeve.
I suggest you keep mum about it and don’t tell anyone that you ever paid any money to any politician”
Me : “and you will not tell anyone that I met Mr Kalmadi. Oh how I wish I had not entered that Coffee house and instead had gone to the Sunshine Hotel next door and enjoyed the music from the juke box ”
Wifey : “Now where in Poona did we have juke box?”
Me: “well that is another long story about my right handed friend who drank coffee with his left hand, but I am not repeating the whole saga again. But you can read it here


Christine H. said...

Your writing is a joy to read. Now I will have to find out more about Mr. Kalmadi.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Hi There, Thanks for coming to my blog... Come back anytime.

I am enjoying reading yours... You are quite a good writer.

Harman said...

very nice enjoyed reading the conversation!

Summer Ross said...

amusing, entertaining, and curious. well done.

DUTA said...

I've greatly enjoyed reading the humorous dialogue between you and your wife.
The picture displaying an indian dance is superb!

Daisy said...

That was fun to read. :-)

I love the bright colors in the Indian dance photo. Very pretty!

ModernMom said...

Your pictures and dialogue provided a great read!

Renu said...

Very enjoyable conversation..see where Kalmadi has reached..politics is the best profession:):):)

Amrita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Neha said...

Awesome...loved every bit of it! You have a way with words!

Amrita said...

your "sins" of 1975 have come to haunt you in 2010 :)
Yeah, you are right. You cannot be too careful about all this. Do not,I repeat' DONOT let ANYONE get an inkling of your teen rupiah pachaas paisa business with Kalmadi.:)

Hilarious post, loved every bit of this :)

Anu said...

wonderful!! loved reading this!

BK Chowla, said...

Houmour at its best. I wish Kalmadi would read this post.

Atul said...

OMG!! ... do i have to delete all my comments from ur blog?? and what about the emails! ... wat if CBI arrives @ my door step as well! eeeew!! ;-)

Ajay Jose Paul said...

Missed watching the Commonwealth games/opening ceremony/dances. Need to catch up on the highlights.

kasthurirajam said... reading this

Kiran Bajaj Sawhney said...

Very interesting and amusing. I did not know that kalmadi owned this coffee house.

dr.antony said...

I enjoyed reading this.You have a way with words

Smartalec said...

Hehe love the subtle humor! Your moolah was probably used by Kalmadi as seed money :p

Madhu said...

Enjoyed reading it. I didnt know this coffee house is Kalmadi's.

Brownie said...

That was enjoyable to read. I must confess, I didn't understand it all, so I should do a bit of research.

I love the bright colors of the dancers.

Say, I don't know if you are following; if you are please note that I changed my url :)

Gorges Smythe said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gorges Smythe said...

I don't know anything about the guilt or innocence of Mr. Kalmadi, but I DO know that too many people are jealous of anyone who is successful.

Amusing conversation with your wife, you’ve got a good feel for humor.

Also, thanks for stopping by my blog, even if it WAS to comment on the blog of another! :-)

Crystal Mary said...

Yes, I also love your story and your humour...
The photos are wonderful!!! People always have to complain about something..the poor man, you should write him a letter and tell him all the good things..I would. I did that to our Prime Minister when he got over thrown. Can you imagine. A letter of praise would surely lift the poor man.

Meenal said...

hilarious! kalmadi still sucks though!!

Nita Rane said...

Joe, I can already imagine what a cute couple your wife and you make, I love your simple style of writing and enjoyed this story too like the others. Keep the words flowing!

Joseph Pulikotil said...


Very hilarious post.Fine sense of humor.Lovely development of an interesting conversation.

Suresh Kalmadi is an inefficient man and he had no control.He would have nearly got a very bad name for India.So he has to face the consequences.

Best wishes,

Virtual Poona Blogger said...

Bur he is awaiting your Friend Confirmation on Facebook !

Australian Satirist said...

Right. Those dancers look beautiful – and so stylish. He gets 10 out of 10 for taste.

Rajesh said...

Very interesting.

priya singh said...

nice work....
i m also from pune.

Anahita said...

good sense of humour~~

Fresh Local and Best said...

This is quite an entertaining and humorous dialogue.

simplypallu said...

It's sad that the lovely place no longer exists! In it's place has sprung yet another monstrous mall.

Gopikaa Ramanan said...

I so enjoyed your sense of humour! Nice post!

Myrna R. said...

What a lovely and funny story. You really have a gift for writing. I enjoyed this very much.

Thanks for visiting my blog. I'll come back to yours, and read more about your very interesting life.

A said...

Man. I am worried now. You paid him 3:50 and I am your friend....worried worried...

Very nice post.

Sowmya said...

enjoyed reading... good one

Ria said...

Interesting post for sure...3.50 Rs. :P

Indrani said...

Well written.

radha said...

One post about the guy who met Hitler. Another about one who ran the CWG like a dictator. And the common link... you! Sure needs investigation!

Alka Gurha said...

Kalmadi and his twin assets....And I am not talking about the property he has in Pune...

Great post with lovely pics.Very imaginative.

Haddock said...

@ Christine H
Thanks Christine. You will get lot of info about him if you Google.

@ Betsy
Good to know that you enjoyed.

@ Harman
Thanks Harman.

@ Summer Ross
Thanks Ross

Good to know you enjoyed.

@ Daisy
Thanks Daisy.

@ Modern Mom

@ Renu
Ha ha …agree on that (though its not my cup of tea)

@ Neha
Thanks Neha

@ Amrita
Sins? I just had Idli with Sambhar and chutney, washed down by coffee :-

@ Anu
Thanks Anu

@ B K Chowla
Yes I too feel that way. Any way to make him look at my post ?

@ Atul
All my friends deserting me?

@ Ajay
The opening ceremony was really good. (better than the closing ceremony)

@ kasthurirajam
Thanks kasthurirajam

@ Kiran Bajaj
Just like me (I too did not know at that time) But now it is not there. Replaced by a mall.

@ Dr Antony
Thanks Dr

@ Smartalec
Seed money? Oh my God that is worse.

@ Madhu
It has been replaced by a mall

@ Brownie
Noted your url

@ Gorges Smythe
Have commented on your post too :-

@ Crystal Mary
Hope you got a reply for the letter. . . .

@ Meenal
Not a good thing to tell about a great man (hope he does not read your comment)

@ Nita Rane
Thanks for that Nita. Will try to keep up the standard (and hope I succeed)

@ Joseph
Thanks for the compliments.
Tut, tut, you are belittling my Pune man.

@ Virtual Poona
Yeah I saw that site on FB, but I wonder of it is his own.

@ Australian Satirist
You are right. The opening ceremony was really awesome

@ Rajesh
Thanks there

@ priya
Good to meet some one from Pune

@ Anahita
Thanks Anahita

@ Fresh Local and Best
Thanks there

@ simplypallu
Very sad about it. Lots of malls springing up all over the place.

@ Gopikaa Ramanan
Thanks Gopikaa

@ Myrna R
Thanks Myrna. You are most welcome.

@ A
Don’t be worried. I won’t mention that you are my friend :-

@ Sowmya
Thanks Sowmya

@ Ria
Yeah the value may be less 3.50, but the implications are more :-

@ Indrani
Thanks Indrani

@ radha
Now you are giving me the jitters

@ Alka Gruha
Thanks Alka

sandhyaa said...

well written !
and u certainly did a good thing by keeping it a secret ! CBI could suspect you for something with THAT kinda money ! ;)

Shalini said...


Priya Shankar said...

This is so hilarious. I read someone else's comment which said "he is waiting for you to confirm him on facebook" and I burst out laughing! =)

Bikramjit said...

:) loved the conversation
I hope they dont find out you gave the money to kalmadi and he did not give you a reciept see he saved on TAX on that tooo :)

nice one he he hehe


Geeta said...

Hilarious and I loved the conversation between you and your wife. Will stop by for more.

Thanks for stopping by my blog.

RamMmm said...

That was hilariously hilarious. :-) Given our propensity for recordkeeping, who knows, your skewered receipt may be surviving in some dusty vault had Kalmadi paid his income tax then showing the receipts as proof of income. :-)

Anjuli said...

Your writing is as refreshing as ever!! You always bring a great big smile to my face- I think I've finally caught up with your posts- let me make sure there are none I have missed.

sangeeta said...

great humor...